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Welcome to Texts Made Public. We created TMP for the purpose of sharing funny facebook status updates, funny sayings, funny text messages, drunk texts and other funny texts from everyday people like yourself. It's anonymous and no sign up is required.

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(786): Dude, you stole my toothbrush last night.

(802): I was sooo drunk. n high.

(786): Yeah, I know. You left a post-it in its place. "borrowed sword to kill homeless."


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(678): I just woke up to an apartment full of beer cans, pizza boxes, and jager bottles. What the fuck happened last night?

(303): We lived my friend. We lived.


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(612): they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.


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(414): I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.


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(703): i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.


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(703): And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."


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