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Welcome to Texts Made Public. We created TMP for the purpose of sharing funny facebook status updates, funny sayings, funny text messages, drunk texts and other funny texts from everyday people like yourself. It's anonymous and no sign up is required.

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A vampire goes into a pub and asks for boiling water. The bartender says "I thought you only drank blood?" The vampire pulls out a used tampon and says "I'm making tea." --- Deadmau5trap


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(415): if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?


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(402): I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad


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A can of Four Loko and a slice of pizza.


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How can I hurt my arm?


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(602): Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?


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